Sometimes we think of love. Love is a difficult way to thinking because it is not to think but to feel. There are people who've been together for decades but eventually foundered. There are people who know only a few days but then got married. There also have never met but straight married for matchmaking.
I have a true story of love experienced by one of my friends. A proverb: Witing tresno jalaran soko kulino. Love comes because it used. Maybe, some of us do not believe in this maxim. But I got a story that could make you believe this proverb. For confidentiality, I will disguise the names of characters.
One day, Ahmad visited home of Kiai Saleh. Kiai Saleh is a respected person in the village. Almost every day the house visited by the public for consultation many things, for education, worship, even married. He has a largest school in region. He has nine cute children when Ahmad visited. Besides, he was not too old.
“Assalamu’alaikum,” said Ahmad then answered by Kiai Saleh with wa’alaikumsalam. “Sit down, please.” Ahmad sat in front of Kiai. “How are you?” Kiai Saleh start the warm dialogue. “I am not good, Kiai” he said. Kiai surprised with Ahmad answered.
Kiai Saleh called an assistant to make drinks. Then he saw a man in front of him. “Tell me about your problem. Maybe, I can help you,” said Kiai.
“I have problem with my married, Kiai.”
“What the problem? Your wife still not pregnant? You are in jobless? Or what?”
Ahmad bowed. He just looked at the floor. “I got married because matchmaking. My wife is a daughter of my father friend. After the first meet, just only once, we got married with a simple party. I see my wife eyes. She is not enjoy with our married. After three month, she still often cry. I do not have the heart.”
“I am sorry to hear that. What are your plans?”
“I don’t know, Kiai. But, I can’t stand with this situation. Give me an advice.”
“What you said? You can’t stand?”
“I am sorry, Kiai. But this is sound of my heart.”
“Do you want to divorce?”
“If it is a best way, I will do it.”
“Astaghfirullah… In our religion, divorce is not forbidden. But divorce is most hated by God.”
“But I don’t know how to make her fall in love with me. I shy when my parents ask to me, when you have a child, Son?”
“Do you love your wife?”
“For the first time we meet, I fall in love with her. I promise. She is good looking. She is beautiful.”
“Listen. Do you know how much my children now?” Kiai Saleh said.
“I think seven.”
“Wrong. I have nine children. But I have same story with you. I got married by matchmaking. This is ordinary in my family.”
“So, when your first son was born?”
“When my married age was seven years.” Ahmad surprised with Kiai Saleh outgiving. “How can?” Ahmad asked to him.
“This is the power of patience. God always give us as we need to Him. You must believe that. We still in different bed until five years. When my wife went to her parent house, she would not be with me. At the first, I have same with you. I feel I have not enough power to stand in that situation. But my dad remind me that the married is worship. Worship is a way to heaven.
“Every day, I do things that are usually done by housewife. I cooking, washing, sweeping and others. While my wife, she always read of Quran. And you know, every night and morning , I must learn my students. But I did it for her. One day, my wife sick. I did best for her. I always beside her.”
“Then, what happened, Kiai?”
“Be patience, Son. I will tell you what happened after,” said Kiai.
“Oh, I am sorry, Kiai. I am very enthusiastic with your story,” said Ahmad. He smile.
“In one night, my wife told me that she wanted to teach like me. She was memorized all of Quran verses. She asked to me to building a boarding islamic school for women. I said of course. Why not? I didn’t have much of money but I believe when there was a need, there’s a way. I told my father and He cried because happy. Then, He gave me much of money to built the building.
“Now, you can see it. I have a thousand student who live in this building. I have a lot of children. And my wife, She always beside me. Our love born from a great word: patience. This is true love.”
Ahmad cried when Kiai Saleh finished his story. He never thought that the great man with great personality like Kiai Saleh actually has a bad experience about love in his life. Everyone knew who the kiai is. Everyone knew who the father of Him. But patience change a bad story to the sweet story like in romance.
After that, Ahmad swore to Kiai Saleh to be patience.
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